Skyhorse , 2014
Agent: Jill Marr
The goal of parenting is to train your children to have slightly better manners than a dog. If you've achieved that by the end of day (or even if you've failed majestically trying), it is important to celebrate the little things. Like bedtime. And screw-top wine. And with Mommyfesto, by award-winning humor blogger Leanne Shirtliffe, you'll learn the nitty-gritty about what it means to be a real parent. Without resorting to stereotypical "poo and pee jokes," Shirtliffe finds humor in the insanity of raising children and celebrates using how-to-parent-like-an-expert books as paperweights for your child's art collection in the recycling bin. Mommyfesto contains more than 150 realistic (and downright humorous) truths about parenting, such as:
A Band-Aid and a kiss solve most daily crises. So does talking like a pirate.
Expectations of child rearing should be thrown out the window. It's better than throwing out your child.
If you can survive parented piano lessons, you can survive a zombie apocalypse.
And much more!
Mommyfesto offers parents the opportunity to laugh at the absurdity of childrearing and to realize there is no right way to do it. Blank pages in the back of the book encourage moms (and dads, too!) to add their beliefs, whether bizarre, funny, or even serious, to the book, making this a go-to guide for generations of crazed parents.